Torah Sisters Meetups
Hostess Handbook
Everything you need to host a Torah Sisters Meetup. Bookmark this page; I update it as we learn together.
Last updated: September 2026
What’s new
- September 2026 — Handbook published.
Section 1
Welcome, Sister
You said yes. Thank you.
For years the most common question I have been asked is, “Do you know anyone near me who keeps Torah?” Every pin on the Meetups map is the answer to that question, and every pin started with one woman who was willing to say, “Come sit with me.” Now that woman is you.
Here is what I want you to know before you read another word: you are not a pastor, a teacher, or an event planner. You are a hostess. Your whole job is to pick a place and a time, and be the one to facilitate women meeting each other.
Read it once now, then come back whenever you need it. I update it as we all learn together, and I'll let you know by email when something changes.
Shalom,
Amy
Section 2
What I Will Do for You
You may use my branding. You may call your meetup a Torah Sisters meetup. This is a big deal to me, but it is my gift to you. I hope that by using the trademarked name "Torah Sisters," it will draw women to your group. You may also use this logo, just right click to download and save it.
Right-click the logo (or press and hold on your phone) to save it.
I'll send you periodic emails to encourage you in your new hostess ministry. I want you to run your meetup how YOU want. Keep it simple, and don't feel like you have to do anything fancy.
Open my emails. Each one will contain important updates about all the meetups that you should be aware of, and a little encouragement from me. Let me keep in touch with you by opening the emails when they come. Add Amy@TorahSisters.com to your email contacts so they don't go to spam.
Section 3
What You Will Do
You'll not allow certain very dangerous doctrines to be promoted. There are many disagreements among those who call themselves "Torah Observant," and I want you to welcome ladies with varying beliefs. But there are some doctrines that are very weighty and dangerous, so Todd and I want you to disallow them to be promoted at your meetups. What ladies do on their own time is their business. We are only concerned with what goes on at an event that bears the name "Torah Sisters." Those topics not to be promoted are:
- Polygamy as permissible.
- Rejecting Yeshua as divine, the Messiah come in the flesh, and the source of our salvation.
- Torah is optional for Christians today.
If a lady shows up and you overhear her speaking of those things in a way to get others to believe them, shut it down. Ask politely, but firmly. You may say something like, "Todd and Amy don't allow these matters to be promoted at their meetups. Please change the topic. I want you to stay and continue to join us, but Todd and Amy have made this topic off limits at Torah Sisters events. I have to do what they asked of me."
Be patient with a slow start. Even if only two of you show up for a while, please stick with it. Don't be quick to end your meetup. Pray that women will find you. I'll be working hard to help them from my end, too! Get the word out where you live. Be patient with growth. The women are out there and they need you.
Be welcoming of women with the many other beliefs held in our community. Be kind, welcoming, and inviting. Be a person who focuses on what the ladies have in common, not on their differences. But allow them to discuss their other differences.
Communicate well with the women who reach out to you from the map and those already attending. Respond to requests for information within a day or two. Remind all recent attendees when and where the next meetup is. If you need to cancel last minute (which is totally allowed and understandable), communicate that to your attendees.
Prevent your own burnout. I pray you are in this for a long haul, and what a glorious ministry you're starting, thank you! But protect your shalom. Some ideas:
Be polite, but firm with difficult women. I highly recommend having a co-host who is also a mature believer to help. Your husband should be your greatest help and lead in difficult matters if you're married. You may have to say eventually to a difficult woman, "This meetup is not a good fit for you." I pray it never happens, but be a good shepherdess. Protect yourself and your guests. Do Matthew 18. I cannot help you with disputes because I'm not there and I don't know the women, however. This will be the hardest part of your ministry, but it will also be rare. You can do it, Sister.
Keep it simple. Don't overdo it. I'll say it again. DON'T OVERDO IT. Women are not coming for the food, decor or setting. They are coming for each other. Keep the setup and expense simple, simple, simple. If another woman offers to help, let her! You will have a lot on your plate, accept help. Keep it easy on yourself.
Keep it free. Please keep most of your meetups free for women to attend. You can meet at a coffee shop or restaurant, but allow women to just sit and not order anything. Sometimes, you may do a paid event together, and that's totally fine, but I want most meetups to be free for women to attend.
Donations are allowed if you rent a space. If you need to pay a fee to rent a location, you have to handle that expense yourself. If ladies offer to donate money to help cover the rental costs, you should feel free to take that money, but please use it only to cover rental costs. Don't take more than that. Do not open any kind of account in the name of Torah Sisters. Do not become a "church" and do not do disbursements to women asking for money. These activities should be done in the setting of an organized fellowship led by men who have a formal way of taking care of the widows, orphans and poor in their congregation. You are not leading a congregation. The purpose of these meetups is to help women get into a Sabbath congregation or for their husbands to come together and start one.
Stick to the vision the Father gave you. If you think you're supposed to start a group for just widows, do it. If it's for adult women and no kids should be allowed, do it. If you think it's for all women and kids, do it. If you think it's for single young women, do it. Don't let people change your mind and do something different from what the Father is telling you.
Welcome more meetups in your area. Be excited and glad when more women start Torah Sisters Meetups in your area. This is a good thing! Not everyone fits well in each meetup. It's okay. Even suggest it when appropriate. For example, if you have a group that allows kids, and a woman is very unhappy about that, remind her that it'd be wonderful for her to start her own Torah Sisters meetup that doesn't allow kids. Chances are, there are other women who share her preference. You cannot please everyone, Sister. Welcome more groups in your area. It's okay.
Keep in touch with me if you need to pause. If you need to put your meetup on a long pause or resign from being a hostess, that's okay! Just let me know so I can take you off the map. But please first encourage another woman to step in and take over. Then she should send me her information.
Hostess Agreement
Torah Sisters Meetups are independent gatherings hosted by volunteers. Torah Sisters LLC provides the name and the map listing, but it does not organize, supervise, insure or control your meetup, and it is not responsible for what happens there.
By hosting, you agree that you are acting on your own behalf and not as an employee, agent or representative of Torah Sisters LLC; that you are responsible for choosing a safe location and for the conduct of your gathering; that you will not collect money, open accounts or enter agreements in the Torah Sisters name; and that you release Torah Sisters LLC and its owners from any claim, loss, injury or damage connected with your meetup. Torah Sisters LLC may remove a listing or withdraw permission to use its name at any time.
Section 4
Where and When to Meet
You decide where and when to meet.
How often you meet is up to you. I think a monthly meetup would be best for solidifying friendships, but every other month or every three months is great, too. You, as the hostess, decide the frequency. You cannot please everyone. You decide. Remember that women can get together outside of your meetup, too. In fact, that would be wonderful! Try to be consistent, like "the first Tuesday of each month at 10:00 am."
Which day you meet is up to you. Your schedule may work best for a Tuesday morning, or Thursday evening, or Friday lunch. Work around your schedule because you're the hostess. Remember, if a lady cannot attend, she can start her own Torah Sisters Meetup, and that's a good thing! But stick to what's best for you.
You can meet on Shabbat. Your meetup could be a Friday evening or Saturday if it's in your home and doesn't violate Shabbat. Don't order pizza on Sabbath, for example, or rent a place where people have to work.
Where you meet is up to you. Some ideas of free/cheap places to meet include:
- Your home. (Ladies are actually more likely to attend if it's NOT at your home, however. Don't feel obligated to host in your home. Also, be careful and safe.)
- Reserve a room at a local library.
- Coffee shop, Panera, restaurant.
- Rent a room at a local church.
- Reserve a room at a senior center.
- Park
- Nature Center
- Mall Food Court
How long is up to you. Two hours is about right. Say the end time out loud in the invitation and honor it. Start and end on time. I'll say it again, start and end on time.
Get a Helper. I recommend you invite another woman to partner with you in this. So that, at least, if you cannot attend an upcoming gathering, she could run it and it doesn't have to be canceled.
Tell someone. Let your husband or a friend know where you’ll be and when you expect to be done. Drive yourself. Keep your phone charged. This is ordinary wisdom for meeting anyone new, and I would rather say it than assume it.
Reminders bring people. Remind the ladies the day before your meetup.
Set up early. Arrive fifteen minutes before your ladies. Put a small “Torah Sisters Meetup” sign on the table (see printables) so a nervous first-timer knows exactly where to go.
Use name tags. If you can afford to supply name tags, please do so. They help SO much.
Section 5
What To Do
You decide what goes on at your meetup.
Food, coffee and drinks are not necessary. You don't need to provide food, coffee or drink. You don't even need to have a potluck. Ladies don't need to bring snacks. When you start doing these things, then ladies will start expecting you to provide paper products, drinking water and so on. I don't want this to be hard on you. When ladies are joining for a 2-hour meetup, they can bring their own water bottles and host your meetup it between meal times. Keep it simple. If food is there, be sure it's all clean according to Leviticus 11. If a woman accidentally brings an unclean dish, ask her to take it to her car.
Keep it simple. Conversation and company is best. Honestly, my favorite meetup would be a 2-hour block of time with just conversation, and zero programming. Don't over-program it. You can do a Bible study, but that may intimidate some women. You can do a prayer request time but some women use it as a stage for gossip. There are pros and cons to all activities. You decide. Try things and experiment. Tell the women, "We are going to do this today, but next month may be different." Always allow a woman to "pass" if you go around the room sharing.
Section 6
When things get tricky
You will not need most of these. Keep them anyway.
One Sister talks the whole time. Set the rule before she can break it: “I’d love to hear from everyone today, so let’s keep each turn to a minute or two.” Sit beside her rather than across from her. When she pauses: “That’s such a good point — Karen, what about you?” If it keeps happening, tell her privately and kindly that you need her help drawing out the quieter ladies; talkers usually love a job.
One Sister never talks. Do not call on her cold. Sit her beside you, thank her when she does share, and let her pass as often as she needs to. Text her afterward: “So glad you came.” Sometimes let her choose which question she will answer before the round starts.
Nobody came. It could happen. It says nothing about you and almost nothing about the group. Text your ladies a photo of your coffee and a cheerful “Missed you — same time next month!” Then keep the date. Groups that cancel and reschedule lose people; groups that keep showing up gain them.
Kids everywhere. If your group is for moms who bring kids, choose kid-proof places, keep the meetup shorter, and ask the moms what works for them; they will tell you. A separate group for women without children can exist in the same town.
Beliefs differ. They will, in small ways, because our community is like that. Say it plainly: “We’re here to be friends, not to settle it.” Keep the main things the main things — love for Yeshua and obedience to the whole Bible — and steer strife out the door the moment it walks in. If a Sister repeatedly turns meetups into debates, take her for coffee privately and ask her to help you protect the peace of the group.
A Sister is in crisis. Listen. Pray with her, right there if she wants it. Then help her get to the people who should be helping: her husband, her congregation, a counselor, a doctor. You are a friend, not a rescue service, and friends are allowed to say “This is bigger than me, and I’m going to help you find help.” If anyone’s safety is at risk, call the emergency number where you live.
A woman shows up who doesn’t fit (a man, someone hostile, someone clearly there to argue). Be gracious and brief, keep the meetup public, and if you feel unsafe, end early. You never have to host anyone.
Section 7
Printables
Print what helps, ignore the rest. All three are PDFs with white backgrounds, so they are easy on your printer ink.
- Table sign: “Torah Sisters Meetup — come sit with us.” Page 1 is a full sheet to tape up; page 2 folds in half into a table tent.
- Name tags, eight per sheet. Fits Avery 5395 name-badge labels, or print on cardstock and cut them out.
- Sign-in sheet (first name, last name, email, phone number)
Questions? Reply to any of my emails, or write to me.