By Amy Guenther
If you’re reading this, then you’ve been hurt by someone. How do I know? Because all of us have been hurt by someone at some time. This is for those of you going through it right now.
The degree to how we’ve been hurt may vary, but we’ve all been the victim of being slandered, shamed, unjustly accused and so on, in some way. We have been unfairly treated when we didn’t deserve it. Or perhaps we’ve been ignored, abandoned, or just plain made to feel worthless.
(I’m mostly talking about hurt feelings here, but I suppose this blog post can apply to physical harm, as well, though that’s not my focus here.)
When we are hurt in these ways, it can be crushing, overwhelming and sometimes even despair sets in. The pain, heartache and grief can be deep, leaving wounds and scars that can set in for days, weeks, months or even years for some.
And, let’s be honest. Sometimes our flesh wants to get revenge. We want that person to experience the same treatment they gave to us. It’s our flesh’s nature to want revenge, in a sense, and to see justice prevail. Somehow we think that will sooth our aching heart, ego and hurt feelings.
(I’m not talking about situations where the person has repented… that’s a different story.)
Let me also be clear, these feelings of wanting revenge are not Biblical or right. But sometimes, we struggle with this sin of wanting to see the person who hurt us suffer, even when we know those fleshly feelings are not in keeping with Torah and walking like Yeshua.
Yehovah is a God of justice, certainly, and we can and should rest in that, and leave it all to Him and fill ourselves with forgiveness as we ourselves have been forgiven. But sometimes, especially in those initial days after being hurt, in our weakness and our own sinfulness, we struggle.
I want to remind you that when you are in that struggle and you want to (metaphorically) punch someone in the gut, you can direct that energy and punch the real bad guy in the gut.
Who are you really mad at?
When you feel like you’re in a battle with another person who hurts you, you MUST remember that your battle is not again flesh and blood. (Eph. 6:12.) When you direct your anger, vengeance, and malice toward a person, you’re missing the point entirely.
Yes, that person did something awful to you. But what’s the “why” behind it? If that person sinned against you, then why? Who is the one that made them sin? There’s only one, and it’s Satan. Why stay angry at the person, when it should be the Enemy that deserves your disgust, hate and resentment?
(There’s much more to say about reconciliation, but I’ll save that for another post.)
Redirect your feelings. Direct your thoughts to how you can “get back” at Satan for what’s he has caused. Then determine to do just that: Get back at Satan!
Punch Satan in the gut by loving someone.
And here’s how you get back at Satan: love someone.
Yes, it’s that simple. When you show love to someone, you are punching Satan in the gut. Want to punch him in the face, too? Do the loving thing in the name of Yeshua! POW! A left hook in Satan’s kisser!
I know I’m not speaking anything new or profound here, but sometimes we need reminders of core truths. And while this blog post may not be profound, the impact of doing this can be dramatically profound!
Satan is hate, ugliness, sin and everything that is wrong in the world, and he is the reason why we sin, hurt each other and don’t forgive as we should.
When you take your hurt, and direct that energy into doing something loving for someone, Satan loses the battle. He wants to bring you down, friend. He wants to crush you. He wants you to feel worthless and defeated, and sometimes he gets to people, even believers and causes someone to sin in a way that hurts you. You’re a threat to him, after all!
The hurt you feel is real, and you will suffer, but while you suffer, maybe even become depressed, please, please, please, even if you must force yourself, find a way to show love to someone.
It doesn’t have to be the person you hurt, (although that’s a good idea!) but find someone to love. If you can find someone who you know is also hurting as you are, what a great opportunity for you!
How you show them love is not really the purpose of this article, but there are so many ways! Pray for them, (in person, so they know you’re praying), take someone a meal, offer someone help, help someone financially. Finding a way to love someone shouldn’t be difficult for you. As believers we should be doing this all the time. Do the loving thing in person.
Satan wants you on the bench, out of the “love” game.
But often when we are deeply hurt, we become so engrossed in our own suffering and focus on our own pain so much that we become trapped in it and all of our energy is spent thinking about our hurt, the injustice and the “why’s.”
But isn’t that exactly what Satan wants? He wants your hurt to consume you so much that you quit going about your Kingdom work. He wants to take you out of commission and sit you on the bench for a while. Don’t let him win!
During your hurting, love someone. PUNCH! Right in Satan’s gut!
In the midst of unjust treatment, love someone. KICK! Right in Satan’s face!
While you suffer unfairly, love someone. JAB! Right in Satan’s kisser!
Remember to do the love thing in the name of Yeshua, and you’ll knock Satan right down. And then, to Yehovah’s glory, you have won, not Satan.
Read this (don’t skim, READ this… 🙂
“Dear friends, do not be surprised at the fiery ordeal that has come on you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice inasmuch as you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed. If you are insulted because of the name of Christ, you are blessed, for the Spirit of glory and of God rests on you. If you suffer, it should not be as a murderer or thief or any other kind of criminal, or even as a meddler. However, if you suffer as a Christian, do not be ashamed, but praise God that you bear that name. For it is time for judgment to begin with God’s household; and if it begins with us, what will the outcome be for those who do not obey the gospel of God? And, “If it is hard for the righteous to be saved, what will become of the ungodly and the sinner?” So then, those who suffer according to God’s will should commit themselves to their faithful Creator and continue to do good.” 1 Peter 4:12-19
While we should being showing love just because it’s the right thing to do, I do want to mention a couple of personal benefits that will come to you. The reason I’m mentioning these is because I know what when we hurt, sometimes we need a little more motivation to do the right thing, get off the “pity party” couch and get moving in a loving direction.
- When you show love, you’ll feel loved back. Don’t we all know that when we bless others, we will feel even more blessed? When you go out of your way to love someone, they will likely be sure you know they appreciate you, love you, and thank God for you. And isn’t that exactly what you need to hear right now?
- The task will distract you. Choose a way to love that requires a little effort and planning. In doing so, you’ll be distracting yourself, at least a little, from your own pain.
- You’ll start to feel grateful. This sounds cliche, but it’s true: there’s always someone who has it worse than you. We should always be loving those who are going through a hard time. Maybe as you pay attention to others who have needs and hurts, you will start to feel grateful for the good relationships you do have, and the broken one won’t see so devastating. Yehovah is good. All the time.